Saturday, April 30, 2016

A.F. Branco - Criminal Minds

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Previous Post: Trump to Kasich: Take Small Bites!

Virginia's governor just signed an executive order allowing felons to vote again.  Wonder what Hillary Clinton has to say about that?
Hey look!  They've got the exact same shade of orange on!


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Friday, April 29, 2016

Trump to Kasich: Take Small Bites!

Trigger Warning:
Did someone order the SEE food?

Previous Post: A.F. Branco - Bernie's Rubble

Tell your friends about John Kasich's YUGE appetite:

Donald Trump took a few moments out of a campaign rally the other day in order to remark upon John Kasich's habit of having press conferences while he was eating.  Specifically, Donald Trump called the habit "disgusting," and commented on the YUGE bites Kasich tends to take.  I've managed to find a video that has a mashup of Donald Trump's remarks alongside some of John Kasich's dining appearances.  Is the Donald correct?  Is John Kasich a disgusting, filthy pig?  Judge for yourself, dear reader:
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Thursday, April 28, 2016

A.F. Branco - Bernie's Rubble

So how's that Democrat primary race going for Bernie Sanders?  Legal Insurrection's A.F. Branco takes a look:
Oof...that's pretty harsh.  Of course the really sad thing is I'm sure most Democrats will come out in support of Hillary Clinton in the fall.  It's going to be a historic election, just like the last two.  Why pass up the chance to be a part of history by voting for the first black president AND the first woman president?

Hillary Clinton, the first woman President of the United States...
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Wednesday, April 27, 2016

Breaking: Donald Trump Outlines Foreign Policy

Trigger Warning:
A more presidential Donald Trump?
Previous Post: Trump to Kasich: Take Small Bites!

It's been a YUGE news day today, folks.  Donald Trump got up today and outlined his foreign policy strategy at an event in Washington, D.C.  The various news outlets are describing it as a foreign policy "shake up."  

I've linked the full video of his speech below.  It's long, clocking in at around 38 minutes.  It's definitely worth taking the time to watch it in its entirety.  Especially since it's looking more and more like Donald Trump will be the Republican nominee for President of the United States.

Lots of you are probably just getting home from work.  I want you, dear reader, to have the opportunity to view the speech clean slate, so to speak.  I'm not going to give you my opinion of Donald Trump's speech until tomorrow.

Stay tuned, dear reader, stay tuned.

Spread the word about The Donald's YUGE foreign policy speech:

Homemade Dog Treat: Sweet Potato Chews

Trigger Warning:
This dog has no idea what he's doing...
There's nothing out there quite as awesome as the humble sweet potato.  This common vegetable is packed with nutrients, and can be baked, fried, put in a pie.  Whatever the hell you want to do with a sweet potato, you can do it.  You can even find sweet potatoes as ingredients in most high-end dog foods.  Of course you'll also find pet store shelves jam packed with sweet potato dog treats of all kinds.  Whether dried or baked into a biscuit, most dogs love chowing down on a few sweet potatoes.

The problem with all of these store-bought sweet potato dog treats, though, is they're freaking expensive as hell.  The top search result for "sweet potato dog treats" on Petco's website, for example, turns up a bag of Dognation Sweet Potato Dog Chews for a whopping $7 for 6.5 ounces.  I don't know about your dogs, but mine would go through that in about a day.  Is there a way that you can make your own sweet potato dog chews for much less than the store brands?

Why yes, yes there is, and I've got the perfect recipe for you right here.

 Sweet Potato Chews
FYI, I got 2 of these giant sweet potatoes for $2.02 at a local Spanish market.
What You'll Need

1 Sweet Potato
1 Sharp, Big Ass Knife
Cutting Board
Baking Sheet
Wire Rack
Oven
Step 1
You'll want to wash and clean your potato before you do anything.  Go ahead and preheat your oven to 250 degrees as well.  Once you've done that set your potato down on your cutting board.  Take your big ass knife and slice off the end of the potato.  Make sure the slice is about 1/3" to 1/4" thick, and set it off to the side.  We'll stick it in the oven with the rest of the slices later.  Waste not and all that.
Step 2
Stand your potato up on the sliced end.  The flat surface will help you control the potato as you're slicing it up.  Slice the potato lengthwise, making sure to keep all the slices between 1/3" and 1/4" thick.  Keep slicing until you can't slice anymore.  If you've purchased any other sweet potatoes set them where they can watch.  Show them what happens when they displease you.  Potato morghulis, bitches.

Note: you can slice your potato by length or width.  Either way is fine.  You'll get more wafer size treats if you're slicing by width.  Wafer-style dog treats can also be easier for smaller pups to get a hold of as well.  The key is to make sure the slices are 1/3" to 1/4" thick.  
Step 4
 Lay out your dog treats on your baking sheet.  You might need more than one depending on how many you ended up with, and how big they are.
Step 5
Place the baking sheet with your dog treats in the oven.  I put mine on the top rack.  Set your timer for about 3 hours if you want some chewy treats.  Add a half hour if you want some treats that are crunchier.  I set mine for 3.5 hours.  Turn the dog treats halfway through cooking.
Step 6
 Remove your sweet potato dog treats from the oven.  Place them on a wire rack to cool. The dog treats will dry and harden as they cool, so the longer you leave them the drier they'll get.

Once your sweet potato treats are ready the only thing left to do is feed them to your pups.  My dogs, Troy and Enrique, absolutely love these treats.  It's to the point where Troy kept trying to get at the treats while they were still cooling.  I tried to take a halfway decent picture of them enjoying the treats, but they were...uncooperative.
This is either a picture of Enrique, or the Loch Ness Monster.
There's a little room to get creative with this dog treat, although not much room.  You could always try basting the sweet potato slices with broth or a bit of olive oil before baking.  I've sprinkled them with a touch of cinnamon before.  In the end, though, this is a very simple dog treat to make.  The only time you put into it is slicing up the potato.  It's easy as long as you don't plan on using your oven for a few hours.

Try this easy dog treat recipe out and let me know how your pups liked it in the comments below.

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Tuesday, April 26, 2016

Bernie Sanders Is Well-Traveled

Trigger Warning:
On the road again.  Just can't wait to get on the road again...
Previous Post: A.F. Branco - Mistaken Identity

Bernie Sanders made a campaign stop on MSNBC Tuesday morning to tell all five people watching why they should vote for him over Hillary Clinton.  Normally MSNBC would be tossing Bernie some softball questions while the "interviewer" stared dreamily at Bernie while doodling hearts around his name in their notebook.  
"Me and Bernie sitting in a tree..."
MSNBC, however, had a rare flash of journalism in which they pointed out that millenials don't like capitalism OR socialism.  What, then, would Bernie like them to believe in?  Bernie Sanders gave the standard answer of "economic justice" (ie, government-sanctioned theft of wealth).  He then proceeded to tell the interviewer exactly how far he had traveled:
You see?  Bernie Sanders has been to ALL those places with extreme income inequality.  From two cities in Michigan all the way to the capital of Pennsylvania.  He's been all over the country, people!  In fact, I've taken the liberty of drawing on a map just how far Bernie Sanders has traveled.
Might want to visit a few other places there, Bernie.  I'm sure it's not just Flint, Detroit, and Philadelphia that are hit with crippling income inequality which hasn't been caused by the Democrats ruling these cities AT ALL.
Wink, wink, nudge, nudge bitches.
Editor's Note: Yes, Bernbots, I know I didn't engage Bernie's answer on the merits.  Sucks when the opposition childishly attacks your candidate for one tiny, little gaffe, doesn't it, bitches?  I wonder if anyone on the right has ever had to suffer that same kind of treatment?
Hmm...nope, can't think of anyone.
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Sunday, April 24, 2016

A.F. Branco - Mistaken Identity

Previous Post: Gay Faker Sued By Whole Foods Was Sued Weeks Ago

Say now, that gentleman holding the sign looks awfully familiar...
That's exactly the attitude of the GOP establishment.  They hate Donald Trump to be sure, but they also hate Ted Cruz just as much.  The GOPe would rather see Hillary Clinton elected rather than either of those two.

At least with Hillary Clinton the game would continue.


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Saturday, April 23, 2016

UPDATE: Pastor Admits He Faked Anti Gay Cake

Trigger Warning:
Turns out the cake IS a lie...
I'm sure you've all heard of the latest Cakegate incident.  A gay pastor in Austin, TX went into a Whole Foods and ordered himself a custom cake.  On the top of the cake he wanted the bakery to write "Love Wins."  This request, of course, was not suspicious in ANY way.

The pastor, Jordan Brown, took the cake home, and allegedly found this heinous surprise waiting for him:
The horror!  Whole Foods is supposed to be a liberal mecca filled with tasty, horribly expensive organic treats!  Why would they do something like this?  Of course Brown announced that he was suing Whole Foods to teach them a lesson for this heinous act.

Of course Whole Foods countered that they did not, in fact write "Love Wins Fag" on the cake.  Then they took it a step further and accused Brown of altering the cake and faking the whole thing.  Whole Foods then released this damning security footage as proof of their claims:
Oh my.  Things aren't looking good for our would-be culture warrior.  You can see from the video that the cake is VERY clearly visible through the window in the box.  It would be impossible for anyone to make it out of the store without seeing what was written on it.

Things got worse for Austin's most (in)famous gay pastor.  Whole Foods announced that THEY were suing HIM to the tune of $100,000.  Why?  The usual fraud and defamation of course.

Why would Jordan Brown do such an incredibly idiotic thing?  I'm sure the lure of fame entered into his calculations.  He most likely figured that the LGBT community, and Austin at large, would rally around him.  The talk shows and news channels would be all over him.  Whole Foods would probably settle with him rather than take it to court.

Oh, and Jordan Brown obviously needed a big pay day.  You know, seeing as how he had been sued just a few weeks ago for defaulting on a $27,000 student loan:
"Wednesday, KXAN obtained a copy of the lawsuit from the Travis County Clerk’s Office claiming Brown defaulted on a $27,000 student loan," reports KXAN. "The petition was filed March 11, 2016 by a student loan trust, and said Brown stopped paying on the student loan issued for the 2007-2008 school year at Slippery Rock University in Pennsylvania."
Whoops.  Jordan Brown conveniently left out that little detail when he announced his lawsuit.  Oh, and Brown's church?  Turns out that might be fake as well:
KXAN may have also discovered that Brown's church is itself some kind of hoax. A reporter for KXAN went to check out the address listed on the loan lawsuit and found that it's the same address the website for Brown's church, Church of Open Doors, lists as its address. Though the church's website claims it meets at his apartment's social hub, when KXAN asked the apartment manager, he said it didn't meet there. 
Good for Whole Foods for actually fighting back against this libtard troll.  It would have been so much easier for them to simply roll over and pay a settlement.  Now I can tell you what other LGBT activists SHOULD be taking away from this incident.  They should be thinking to themselves "hey, maybe we SHOULDN'T fake hate crimes in an attempt to cash in on manufactured bigotry."

Unfortunately the actual takeaway will be "hey, let's avoid fake hate crimes at large chains with legal departments and unlimited funds, and focus on the mom and pop shops instead."

Tell me I'm wrong.

UPDATE: PASTOR ADMITS HE FAKED ANTI-GAY CAKE
 
An openly gay pastor who claimed that a grocery store bakery wrote a homophobic message on his cake has dropped his lawsuit against Whole Foods, claiming he made up the story, according to news reports.

“I apologize to the LGBT community for diverting attention from real issues,” Pastor Jordan Brown said in a statement, according to the ABC affiliate in Austin and other news reports.
Pastor Jordan Brown apologized to Whole Foods, and dropped his lawsuit against them.  Whole Foods has accepted his apology and dropped their counter-suit.

I have to say I am impressed that Whole Foods stuck to their guns.  The fact that they chose to stand and fight speaks volumes as to the character of the company itself.  It would have been so much easier for them to simply cave in and settle.  I'm sure that's what Pastor Brown was counting on.

It's an auspicious day for freedom, dear reader.  Even the little victories count for something.

Friday, April 22, 2016

Happy Earth Day: Climate Warriors Hate You!

Trigger Warning:
For the crime of denying climate change...
Ah Earth Day.  The one day of the year when everyone in the world is reminded that the planet is dying, and it's our fault.

Okay, you got me.  Climate warriors remind us every God damn day that the planet is dying and it's our fault.  They absolutely hate us normal folks.  We drive around in our gas-guzzling, polluting cars.  We stubbornly insist on using energy for modern conveniences such as heat, light, and air conditioning in the summer.  Things would be so much easier if everyone in the world was as committed to saving the planet as they are.

Failing that, though, they'd love it if they could blow us all the hell up.  Literally:

That's an old video from Britain's 10:10 campaign.  It perfectly captures the essence of what exactly the climate warriors really think.  Don't think you're harming the planet?  Don't see what all the fuss is about?  Do you question that mankind is the one causing climate change?  God we would just love to kill you and not have to deal with your sorry, polluting ass anymore.

Of course climate warriors can't just go around blowing up anyone who disagrees with them (yet).  What's the next best thing?  Using the government to prosecute anyone who denies climate change, of course.  Think I'm being completely paranoid?  The Washington Times has the proof:
In the hours before they took the stage for their March 29 press conference, Democratic attorneys general received a secret briefing from two top environmentalists on pursuing climate change dissenters.

Peter Frumhoff of the Union of Concerned Scientists and the Climate Accountability Institute’s Matt Pawa spent 45 minutes each providing talking points behind the scenes on “the imperative of taking action now” and “climate change litigation,” according to a cache of emails released over the weekend by the free market Energy & Environmental Legal Institute.

For climate change groups, the New York press event was the culmination of four years of planning and advocacy in support of an explosive proposition: using the legal system to link fossil fuel firms and others challenging the catastrophic global warming consensus to fraud and even racketeering, the emails and other documents show.
Let's not forget that Obama's own attorney general, Loretta Lynch, is actually discussing this very thing with the FBI:
In news that should shock and anger Americans, U.S. Attorney General Loretta Lynch told the Senate Judiciary Committee on Wednesday that not only has she discussed internally the possibility of pursuing civil actions against so-called “climate change deniers,” but she has “referred it to the FBI to consider whether or not it meets the criteria for which we could take action.”
Even celebrities are getting in on the action.  Bill Nye made a name for himself in the 90s as "The Science Guy," even though he's as much a scientist as I am a professional male dancer.  That doesn't stop him from constantly popping off about the "science" behind climate change, of course.  Bill Nye is also very, very open to the idea of throwing climate deniers in jail:
Bill Nye “the science guy” says in a video interview released Thursday that he is open to the idea of jailing those who deviate from the climate change consensus.

Asked about the heated rhetoric surrounding the climate change debate, such as Robert F. Kennedy Jr.’s previous comments that some climate skeptics should be prosecuted as war criminals, Mr. Nye replied, “We’ll see what happens.”

“Was it appropriate to jail the guys from Enron?” Mr. Nye asked in a video interview with Climate Depot’s Marc Morano. “We’ll see what happens. Was it appropriate to jail people from the cigarette industry who insisted that this addictive product was not addictive, and so on?”
Keep all this in the back of your mind as you celebrate Earth Day today.  Climate warriors would kill you if they could.  Failing that, they'll be just as happy to toss your ass in jail and let you rot.  Unless you toe the company line of course.

Personally, I say we should hit back hard at Mother Nature.  Get her before she gets us.  She's the one who killed the dinosaurs, after all.
We're next...
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Thursday, April 21, 2016

A.F. Branco - The White Flag

Previous Post: A.F Branco - The Finish Line

You might have heard about the Russian jet that buzzed the USS Donald Cook earlier this week.  Well, Legal Insurrection's A.F. Branco gives us an exclusive look at what exactly took place:
The Navy Times has an interesting with a retired Capt. Rick Hoffman on why exactly the USS Donald Cook didn't decorate the landscape with little pieces of Russian jets.  To sum it up, the planes simply weren't a credible threat:
Russian pilots rattled nerves aboard the destroyer Donald Cook, buzzing within yards of the ship in the Baltic Sea. Provocative, sure. But they weren't a credible threat.

So concludes a retired Navy commanding officer, who reviewed photos and videos from the run-ins on Monday and Tuesday, when unarmed Sukhoi Su-24 fighters flew within 1,000 feet of the ship — once coming as close as 30 feet in what U.S. officials called "simulated attacks."  On Monday, a low-flying Russian Ka-27 Helix helicopter also appeared to take photos of the ship.
This was definitely provocative, but it doesn't amount to a threat, said the retired frigate and cruiser CO.

"Well, we’re not at war with Russia," Capt. Rick Hoffman said. "It would be one thing to be operating and have a threatening attack profile from someone who might not recognize me — that’s not the case here."
I'm sure that's all true.  After all I'm not a military expert.  Even still the whole incident perfectly summed up Obama's foreign policy in general.  Surrender first, ask questions later.  Can anyone legitimately say that this would have happened with a stronger president? 

Original Post: From Russia With Love

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Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Fight For 15: An Apocalyptic Tale

Trigger Warning:
Beware the machines...
Previous Post: Libtards Already Fantasizing About Trump's Impeachment

The fight for a $15/hour minimum wage is in full swing, folks.  California declaring a state-wide $15 minimum wage to be instituted by 2020, despite facts or any knowledge of economics, will only embolden liberals.  But what are the consequences of a $15 minimum wage?  

This harrowing, apocalyptic tale was inspired by a Twitter follower of mine, @CalkinsMark.

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Tuesday, April 19, 2016

Libtards Already Fantasizing About Trump's Impeachment

Trigger Warning:
Christ, we're not even done with primary season...

Liberal insanity (but I repeat myself) is a beautiful thing.  It provides hours upon hours of entertainment in addition to constant blog fodder for myself.  Especially when a lefty blog like Politico goes completely off the rails.  What have they done now?  Oh, nothing major.  Just fantasizing about how the impeachment of President Donald J. Trump might go down:

Constitutional experts of all political stripes say it’s surprising for impeachment talk to bubble up this early—but then Trump has been throwing around some surprising ideas for a leading candidate, calling the Geneva Conventions a “problem” and pitching policies that many see as violating international law. “What he’s stated in my judgment would be clearly impeachable offenses,” said Fein, a former Reagan-era Justice Department official who worked on the Bill Clinton impeachment effort. Likewise, Yale Law School lecturer and military justice expert Eugene Fidell offered a similar prediction for Trump from the left. “He’s certainly said things, which if followed through on, would constitute high crimes and misdemeanors,” Fidell said. And doubtless many of Trump’s foes would like to see him impeached just on principle—the quickest way to broom out a leader who horrifies the inclusive sensibilities of Democrats, and has blown apart the Republican Party he’s nominally part of.
Damn, people.  I don't think I've ever seen an election season where impeachment talk has been thrown around so freaking early.  We're not even halfway through the primary season yet, people!  At least wait until Trump becomes the nominee before you start talking about getting rid of him.

Just what sort of circumstances would lead to a Donald Trump impeachment?   I'm so glad you ask.  Politico was kind enough to tell us exactly what would lead up to impeachment:
He has ordered federal contractors to start building the wall between the United States and Mexico, though neither Mexico nor the U.S. Congress will pay for it. Trump has directed the National Guard to patrol Detroit, Chicago, New York and other neighborhoods with large Muslim populations, and accusations are swirling that he is illegally rounding up suspected Islamic extremists and shipping them off to special detention centers, including the recently reopened Alcatraz Island and to several of the World War II-era internment camps the U.S. government used for Japanese-Americans. Despite the counsel of his foreign policy and military advisers, Trump has commanded the CIA to resume waterboarding and other forms of torture to obtain information about imminent attacks. Inside the intelligence and defense communities, a full-blown internal war has broken out as some interrogators and high-ranking officials follow Trump’s orders, while others refuse to cooperate. Some resign their posts and begin leaking details to the media and Congress. Trump has also ordered airstrikes on the family members of known terrorists from Afghanistan to Libya. CNN airs live coverage of the bombings and protests sweep across the Middle East, North Africa and Europe as the death toll rises for the parents, siblings, spouses and children of ISIL and Al Qaeda fighters. At the United Nations, a resolution is passed, calling for Trump to be tried on war crimes.
 In other words it would take every paranoid fantasy about Donald Trump the Left has ever had.  Sending the military to round up Muslims?  Check.  Creating internment camps for Muslims and other "undesirables?"  Check.  Waterboarding and "other forms of torture" coming back to the CIA?  Check.  Droning innocent civilians to death?  Oh you better believe that's a big, fat check.  In Politico's insane, conspiracy theorist world, Donald Trump is literally Adolf Hitler reborn.

I'll give Politico a little bit of credit; they do admit that their scenario is just a little far-fetched.  Right, and Bernie Sanders is just a little socialist.
Only slightly...
I wish I could say that this one article was just the product of a reporter that's had one too many puffs of the whacky tobaccy.  Sadly, though, this is par for the course for the Left.  We saw this kind of talk and worse all through the Bush years.  The big difference between then and now, however, is the Left at least waited until Bush had been in office for a while before trotting out the crazy horses.  

Donald Trump is different, though.  Trump terrifies the Left like no other politician has before, with the possible exception of Ronald Reagan.  They would love nothing more than to take Trump out of the game permanently.  The Left isn't confident that they can beat Trump in the general election.  Their only viable candidate is the most corrupt, scheming politician in the country.  Liberals do know, however, that the GOP establishment hates Trump almost as much as they do.  Anyone who thinks they would unite behind a President Trump is either hopelessly naive or borderline retarded.

So the Left starts laying the groundwork early for impeaching Donald Trump.  They build the narrative that a Trump presidency would see the worst qualities of America brought to the fore.  That's a narrative that the GOPe has already been trotting out since Trump became the front runner.  A few gentle nudges in the right direction, and suddenly you've got a House that's ready and willing to impeach The Donald on day 2 of his presidency.  

Buckle up, sports fans.  This isn't the last we'll hear of the impeachment talk.  Mark my words.
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Monday, April 18, 2016

5 Reasons to Vote Trump and #MAGA

Trigger Warning:
Just imagine it, fellow patriots...
 Previous Post: A.F Branco - The Finish Line

"Wait a second, Radius, didn't you tell us you couldn't support Donald Trump because he wasn't conservative?"

Close, hypothetical reader.  I said I couldn't support Donald Trump in the primary because he wasn't a conservative.  I was quite clear on the point.

"So why the hell are you telling us we should vote for Trump now?  What are you, some kind of friggin hypocrite?  I bet you wear ladies' underwear, too, you freaking weirdo."

Woah, slow your role there, hypothetical reader.  First of all, there has never been any proof that I have ever worn any kind of underwear.  Secondly, I have a very good reason for suddenly encouraging you to vote for Trump.  In fact, I have five good reasons.  Let me explain.

It's no secret that this election is shaping up to be one of the most contentious in modern history.  Most of the debate is, of course, centered around Donald Trump.  On the one hand you have the #AlwaysTrump crowd agitating and campaigning for their main man, The Donald.  They're convinced that America has a fever, and the only cure is a heavy dose of Trump juice.
Thank you, Internet.
On the other hand you've got the #NeverTrump maniacs.  These folks are absolutely convinced that Donald Trump is the worst possible thing that could happen to this country.  The strange thing about the #NeverTrump folks is they've gotten more rabid the closer we get to the Republican convention.  Somewhat reasoned arguments have gradually given way to foaming, hysterical rants.  These rants usually end with the #NeverTrumpers accusing #AlwaysTrumpers of racism, bigotry, and ultimately blocking them.
The inevitable outcome of a #NeverTrump argument.
There is a third group in American politics.  One that could be seen as an even more fanatical subset of #NeverTrump.  These vapid, dead-eyed, soulless wretches have never been shy about telling us what they think.  Even if it means pushing through a drug-induced haze to do it.  I'm talking, of course, about Hollywood celebrities.
Pictured: political philosopher.
Most of the celebrities in America are profoundly, insanely liberal.  They're feeling the Bern, and this time it's not because of an outbreak of a rare STD that was marinating in Charlie Sheen's tiger blood.  These celebrities are also deathly afraid of a President Donald J. Trump.  To them, Donald Trump is Hitler, the anti-christ, and Superman 4 all rolled into one.  Hell they're so terrified of what a Donald Trump presidency might be that several of them have vowed to up and leave the country should he be elected.

You said you wanted me to give you a reason to vote for Donald Trump, dear reader.  Here you are.  Five of the most ridiculous, vapid, annoying celebrities that have threatened to leave the country if we elect Donald Trump.

 1. Miley Cyrus
You might remember little Miley from her days as a sweet, innocent Disney Channel starlet.  She went from stealing our hearts as Hannah Montana to twerking all over creepy-ass Robin Thicke as soon as she turned 18, however.  Now Miley spends her days trying to be both Madonna and Lady Gaga, but failing hard at both.
The self-styled pansexual (re: whore) really, really hates Donald Trump.  She went on an Instagram tirade against The Donald a few weeks ago.  Miley posted several pictures of Donald Trump with profanity-laden captions that left zero clue as to which horse she was backing.  Here's a hint: Miley is feeling the Bern.  No, it's not from a case of gonorrhea picked up from her latest twerkfest.  At least I don't think it is.

She ended her caption saying that she will move if he is elected.

"We're all just f---ing jam between his rich ass toes!" she wrote. "Honestly f--- this s--- I am moving if this is my president! I don't say things I don't mean!"
2.  Whoopi Goldberg
I'm going to be brutally honest here.  Whoopi Goldberg has not been in a good movie since Sister Act.  No, I'm not counting Lion King as there was no acting involved in that movie.  She's a cackling hyena in real life, too.  Nowadays Whoopi's biggest claim to fame is as one of the shrieking harridans on The View It was during an episode of The View that Whoopi let us know just what she thinks of The Donald:
“Listen, he can be whatever party he wants to be,” she said. “What he can’t be is he can’t be the guy that says it’s your fault stuff isn’t working. That’s not the president I want. Find a way to make stuff work. Stop blaming everybody because all of this, as American citizens, this is our — we did all of this. We’ve allowed all this stuff, so we have to fix it. But you can’t say, ‘Oh, you’re Lebanese or you’re black or you’re Mexican or you’re a woman.’ Stop blaming everybody. Let’s fix the crap. Let’s just fix it. If you can fix it, I will listen to what you have to say. The minute you start pointing and saying that person is a rapist and a murderer, it pisses me off because I’ve been part of that when they just use a blanket statement to talk about black people or when they use a blanket statement to talk about white people or women or any other group. I don’t think that’s America. I don’t want it to be America. Maybe it’s time for me to move, you know.”
“I can afford to go,” she added. “I’ve always been an American, and this has always been my country and we’ve always been able to have discussions. And suddenly now it’s turning into, you know, not them, not them. And you know, we have a lot of friends whose parents saw this already. They don’t want to relive this … So I need all the candidates to get it together. Get back to American values.”
You hear that, Donald?  Whoopi says you need to get back to her version of American values or she's going to leave!

3.  Al Sharpton
That's right, ladies and gentlemen.  The Master Race Baiter and self-styled Emperor of Black People, Al Sharpton, has also threatened to head for the hills if Donald Trump becomes president.  Sharpton made the pronouncement while speaking at a Center for American Progress Action Fund event:
"If Donald Trump is the nominee ... I'm also reserving my ticket to get out of here if he wins. Only because he’d probably have me deported anyhow," Sharpton said to laughs and applause at a Center for American Progress Action Fund event.
Did I miss something here?  Is Al Sharpton not an American citizen or something?  I'm thinking this might have been another "Resist We Much" event.  Either that or Sharpton's actually referring to undocumented members of his house staff.

Pictured: Cher on a Tuesday.
2. Cher
Anyone who's anyone follows Cher on Twitter.  She's known for being the craziest bucket of chicken on the popular social media site.  Hell it's a wonder she's able to put words together to form halfway coherent sentences.  I'm almost positive the botox has finally soaked into her brain.
Cher did manage to tweet out this little nugget during one of her slightly more...lucid moments:
 Of course no one was quite sure if she meant Jupiter the planet, or Jupiter Beach, FL.
1. Rosie O'Donnell
This one isn't too surprising.  Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donnell have had a hate-hate relationship for quite a few years now.  Rosie is probably the one person that Donald Trump truly hates.  On the flip side Rosie hates pretty much everyone else.  The feeling is mutual for the most part.  Rosie O'Donnell leaving America is more than enough reason to vote for Donald Trump.

There you go, hypothetical reader.  Five very good reasons to vote for Donald Trump.  This isn't even close to an exhaustive list of celebrities who would get the hell out of Dodge if The Donald were elected.  There are many, many more libtards getting ready to move on up to Canada or whatever semi-socialist paradise they desire.

Just imagine it, dear reader.  Hollywood completely cleared of sanctimonious liberal elites.  

Talk about making America great again!

Share your thoughts and comments below.  Or follow me on Twitter @trigwarnblog, or check out my Facebook page. 

Saturday, April 16, 2016

A.F Branco - The Finish Line

Who's closer to the finish line in the Democratic primary?  Legal Insurrection's A.F. Branco takes a look at the state of the race:
Oh my.  It seems like Hillary Clinton's getting a helping hand from someone.  Could it be Debbie Wasserman Schultz flying the helicopter?


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Thursday, April 14, 2016

About That Corey Lewandowski Prosecution...

Trigger Warning:
Nevermind.
Remember how Donald Trump's campaign manager, Corey Lewandowski, grabbed Breitbart reporter Michelle Fields during a Florida campaign rally?  Word is Lewandowski grabbed Fields so hard she was nearly thrown to the ground.  He also left massive bruises all over her arm.
Absolutely massive.
Previous Post: Protesting the Colorado GOP

The whole thing turned into a huge mess with Fields quitting Breitbart for not standing by her.  Donald Trump in the meantime resisted calls to fire Lewandowski despite massive pressure from, well, everyone.  The incident came to a head when Michelle Fields filed a police report against Lewandowski.  Palm Beach County police decided to go ahead and charge Lewandowski with battery.  The case was referred to Palm Beach County prosecutor David Aronberg.

A Florida prosecutor has decided not to prosecute Donald Trump’s campaign manager for battery after a March run-in with former Breitbart reporter Michelle Fields, sources with knowledge of the situation told POLITICO.

The decision not to press charges against Corey Lewandowski is scheduled to be announced on Thursday afternoon by Palm Beach County State Attorney David Aronberg.

Fields may still pursue a defamation case against Lewandowski, a source said.
The #NeverTrump crowd has to be feeling pretty down after this.  They had an absolute field day with the whole Lewandowski incident.  Various members of the #NeverTrump community bristled at Donald Trump's insinuation that Michelle Fields had brought it upon herself by violating the Secret Service cordon around him (an assertion that an anonymous Secret Service agent backed up).  #NeverTrump wasn't having any of that, of course.  Many so-called conservatives compared Trump's assertion to blaming a victim of domestic violence for the abuse.  Of course such a charge was both insulting to actual domestic violence victims, as well as blatantly innacurate.

This whole thing smelled from day one, quite frankly.  I first heard of the incident a few hours after it had happened.  I became immediately suspicious when prominent "conservative" media figures, GOP leaders, and progressive media were all marching in lockstep.  Literally everyone universally condemned Donald Trump.  There was talk of a blacklist of Trump supporters being circulated.  Hell at one point there was a list of 16 different "conservative" female pundits calling for Lewandowski to be fired.   Thankfully saner heads have prevailed.  Aronberg recognized how difficult it would have been to actually prove that Lewandowski assaulted Fields.  I suspect this whole, sordid drama isn't over, though.  After all, Michelle Fields still has a civil suit to file.

 Share your thoughts and comments below.  Or follow me on Twitter @trigwarnblog, or check out my Facebook page. 

Wednesday, April 13, 2016

Protesting the Colorado GOP

Trigger Warning:
We're mad as hell...

Most of you by now have heard of what took place with the Colorado caucus this past weekend.  Fossten over at HotGas posted a pretty good run down of what actually happened during the caucus.  Essentially Ted Cruz managed to manipulate the rules set down by the state GOP a year ago, and managed to secure over 30 delegates.  It was totally legal and completely legit.

It also left a really, really bad taste in a lot of voters' mouths.

Many voters, mostly Donald Trump supporters, felt that they had been shut out of the voting process.  These voters were of the opinion that the Colorado GOP had purposely changed the rules to ensure the result that the party wanted.  Specifically, the GOP had manipulated the results to ensure that Donald Trump would not win.  This supposedly paranoid fantasy was all but confirmed when someone with access to the Colorado GOP Twitter account tweeted this little doozy:
What a bunch of dicks...
Of course this tweet was promptly deleted.  The Colorado GOP had issued an apology, and blamed the tweet on "unauthorized access."  It didn't matter, though.  The damage had already been done.  The people of Colorado had confirmation that what they wanted didn't matter one bit.  The GOP had already decided that Donald Trump was not going to win.  They would make sure of thi.  Voters be damned.

Needless to say the people of Colorado are pretty pissed off.  The people are so pissed off that they have planned a protest at the Colorado GOP headquarters.  The protest is set to go off at 3:00 pm local time on Friday, April 15th.  It's perhaps fitting that this protest will be happening on a date traditionally associated with Tax Day.  The group organizing this protest, coloradovotesmatter.org, has set up a website with directions to the protest.

The Protest

I will be joining in this protest.  Rather than joining in person, however, I will be joining in online.  I will be tweeting the above #NeverTrump picture to both the Colorado GOP and the national GOP.  My tweets will be scheduled to start at roughly the same time as the Colorado protest, and I'll be using the hashtag #IStandWithCO.

Why will I be doing this, you ask?  I will say it's not about the rules change.  It's not even about the fact that Ted Cruz managed to win the delegates.  Ted Cruz did the work to secure them.  Donald Trump, for whatever reason, didn't.  It's about the elitist attitude of the GOP.  The party elites have begged the voters for power ever since Obama took office.  They've told us how they need just a little more to stop Obama's agenda.  Of course once they have that power they insist they can't do anything without just a little more.  Then when we finally give them what they want, they treat us with disdain, at best, outright hatred at worst.  The deleted tweet from the Colorado GOP sums it up nicely.

This has to stop.  The GOP must be confronted with what they've done.  They must be called out on their bullshit.  Shoving this tweet in their faces for all the world to see is one way we can do that.
  
Join Me

I will be standing with the Colorado protestors this Friday.  You can either join me or not.  It's your choice.  I sincerely hope, however, that I will not be the only one confronting the GOP online.  If you wish to join me simply tweet this picture and #IStandWithCO to @cologop and @GOP.  I'll be tweeting about every 20 minutes.  

I hope you join me in standing with Colorado this Friday.

Update: I'll be starting the protest at 5:00 pm EST.  That way it will coincide with the physical protest in Colorado.

H/T to fossten over at HotGas for giving this some national attention.  They've got their own post with a few more details over here.

 Share your thoughts and comments below.  Or follow me on Twitter @trigwarnblog, or check out my Facebook page. 

Twits Hate Trump - Trump Peaks

Trigger Warning:
It ain't easy being Trump...
It's no secret that Donald Trump has had one hell of a rough time.  His campaign manager, Corey Lewandowski has been charged with assault, and he's lost both the Wisconsin AND Colorado primaries to arch-rival Ted Cruz.  It just goes to show that it isn't easy being Donald Trump.

The big question on everyone's mind, though, is how have all of these upsets affected public opinion of the Donald?  Do people hate Donald Trump more or less than they did a few weeks ago?  For the answer to those questions we turn to the best scientific arbiter of public opinion...Twitter.
Well, it's official.  I'm never sleeping again.
Apparently the continuum of hatred runs from the child of two of the most hated pop culture icons in the country, to one of the most hated Republicans in the country.  Who knew?
OMG THAT TOTAL BITCH!  I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE DID THAT!  THAT IS LITERALLY THE WORST THING ANYONE HAS EVER DONE IN THE HISTORY OF MANKIND!!!

One question, though.  Who the hell is Payton?
Michael here wears mostly American Eagle.  Hate to tell you, Michael, but that's one of the criteria for being known as an official douchebag.

I bet you have a man-bun.
And a beard.  Just like this guy.  Douche.
Translation: I know next to nothing about politics.  I know absolutely nothing about how economics works.  All I know is my friends love Bernie, and Bernie will give me free stuff. 

Feel the Bern, baby!
You know who else hates McDonald's?  Communists.  Dirty, filthy communists.
Like these guys.  I bet they hate Big Macs and America.
What the hell is "media takeout?"  Have you called up your local news station, ordered some takeout food, and found it lacking?
All right, fair enough.  I don't think there's anyone that could be more hated than this guy...

I wish I could say there were more hate tweets out there.  Surprisingly enough, though, it's pretty sparse out there at the moment.  Perhaps Twitter has reached peak Donald Trump hate.  The case could be made that the twits have spent so much energy hating Donald Trump that they just don't feel it anymore.  It's also possible that the disasters in Colorado and Wisconsin really DID have an effect on the leftist twits.  Maybe they just don't see Donald Trump as the same kind of threat that they once did.

Whatever the case I really hope we haven't reached "peak Trump."   Twitter will become a much less interesting place if that's the case.
Share your thoughts and comments below.  Or follow me on Twitter @trigwarnblog, or check out my Facebook page. 

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